Qualification in Stupidity

Just say, for the sake of argument, that there’s room in your academic arsenal for an extra qualification.

How about enrolling on Course 180 at Occidental College in LA? It’s called, “Stupidity”. Yes, dear reader, you read that correctly; you can have a qualification in Stupidity.

Falling within the auspices of Critical Theory and Social Justice, the blurb describes stupidity as, “neither ignorance nor organicity, but rather, a corollary of knowing and an element of normalcy, the double of intelligence rather than its opposite.”

Is ‘organicity’ even a word?

Sigh.

I suppose, looking at it from the other side, if you don’t pass the course you can officially claim to have failed at Stupidity. Which has got to be better than boasting to have a degree in Stupidity.

It’s kind of a bit like the fact that only people who have been released from psychiatric units have a certificate to say that they’re ‘sane’.

My advice? Stick to acquiring qualifications that are going to be meaningful in the workplace. A qualification in Stupidity is probably not going to be relevant in the sector you want to get into.

Unless, of course, you’re running for parliament.

Posted in - -PRELIVE, -SD JOBSEEKING | Tagged , , , , , | Leave a comment

Dress for Success

You have an interview coming up and you realise that despite having a wardrobe bursting with clothes, you don’t actually have anything that you would like to wear to an interview.
Don’t worry, I’ve been there.

You literally throw everything out and start looking, mixing and matching to find, eventually, that you might actually have something that will give a good first impression.
Yes!
You try it on. Yes. Yes, yes, yes, this still fits.
Oh, perhaps it’s a little tight?
Scratch head. Eye yourself up carefully. Tilt your head to the side and turn to look at how this looks from behind.
I don’t feel comfortable in this.

Back to the heap of clothes to find something that you’ll be happy to wear for a few hours.
You come up with many outfits that can be accessorised with this bag and that shoe but you either find something not quite right with each outfit or you simply don’t know which one to pick.
Eeny meeny miny moe? Point at one randomly?

Dressing the part is never really easy on a normal day so on those days where the pressure is intensified because of an interview; it’s a good idea to keep a few things (well, a lot of things) in mind.

*Firstly, your line of work will determine whether you turn up to an interview corporately suited or with a bit of style injected.
Your interview confirmation call/ email/ letter will usually specify what to wear on the day and with your research, you should know what kind of company you’re dealing with (which will determine what you wear). If you are in doubt though, stick to the standard blacks, greys, navys, creams whites for the suit/ trousers/ skirt/ jacket etc…  and take it from there.

*Save yourself the hassle of having to find something new to wear with each interview you have and set aside a suit, dress or trendy- smart ensemble that you can pull off the hanger, whizz the iron over and grab a few accessories to finish it off. Make sure it isn’t too tight (or too loose) and make sure you feel comfortable in it. It is crucial to have an outfit like this in your wardrobe!

*Full Suit – If this is your choice of interview- wear then make sure it’s pressed properly and fits accordingly.

*Trousers or Skirt – If you’re wearing trousers (cropped, flared, straight leg etc) then make sure the leg length is right. If you’re wearing a skirt then just above the knee is okay but anything shorter than that is a no no. Anything as far down as the middle of your shin is okay for an interview too. Just remember to wear a pair of skin colour tights! A skirt above the knew will be fine with a black or navy pair though, just leave the patterns at home.

*Dress – The rules of the skirt apply here. Remember that you’re going to an interview and not a rave. There’s more than the length and fit to be cautious of here.
If you take off your jacket or cardigan, will the back of the dress look like something for tonight’s party or an office? Will your arms be covered? Are your breasts on display or are they carefully tucked away? You want to give a good first impression, don’t you?

*Shirt/ Blouse – Make sure it isn’t see- through and make sure your breasts aren’t falling out of it. Whether it’s plain, printed patterns, uniquely cut, or designed with appliqué… this part of your ensemble can really display your personality if you want it too.

*Blazer/ Jacket/ Cardigan – It’s a good idea to wear something over your dress/ shirt. A blazer teamed with trousers or a skirt looks smart. It also offers an element of protection from the weather and the AC in case the office has it on full blast. It’s always a good idea to bring one of the three with you to an interview.

*Accessories – If you want to play it safe with your clothing then this is probably the place to go a little crazy with the colour. Accessories are great for injecting yourself into the outfit but you don’t want accessory overload. Consider leaving the necklace at home if a scarf is going to be the main accessory and perhaps leave the bracelets in the box if you opt for a long, statement necklace and studs. Less is always more with accessorising… and especially for an interview.
Earrings – If you must adorn your ears, do so with studs. Two pairs at most, nothing to flashy.
Necklace – You can wear a long, statement necklace or a simple chain if you wanted. Just remember not to wear anything that will create noise – you don’t want to cause any distractions when it’s your time to shine.
Scarf – There are many ways to wear the scarf. Whether you choose to wrap it, tie it or loosely wear it around your neck, the scarf with its many patterns and colours can inject that colour into your ‘professional’ attire
Bracelet – Unless they’re the only thing you’re wearing accessory- wise, don’t weigh your wrist down with a multitude of bracelets. If you do choose to wear bracelets, make sure they don’t make any noise. Remember, this is your interview.
Bag – Bring a bag that will hold everything you intend to carry. If your ensemble is quite neutral and samey in terms of colour, why not make your bag THE accessory? Bright or patent black, make sure you bring a bag that adds to the fabulousness that is you and your ensemble. A bag says a lot about the person wearing it.
Shoes – Nothing impossible to walk in and always something chic. Whether you opt for flats or a three inch heel, make sure you leave the peep toes and worn heels at home. Try and be conservative with the shoes. Whilst a pair of patent red flats will look fantastic with an all black outfit, hot pink heels or strappy black raving shoes might not be so fantastic.

*Hair – Sweep that hair back into a ponytail or a loose bun. A statement clip might be your choice of accessory if you’re not fussed with the likes of bracelets and necklaces as above.
Think about how your hair will represent you.
Natural ladies, there are many ways to stay natural and still get the job without succumbing to relaxer or heat but we both know that a free fro isn’t going to land you the job as a secretary at the prestigious law firm. Regardless of what people think of natural hair though, stay natural and proud – find a (protective) style that you can work with. Freelancing with a small part of your left side shaved and patterned was great but now you’re applying to work for a big organisation, you might want to rethink? And as fantastic as your bright red bob looks, that role of admin assistant might just slip away from you.
Yes, it’s ridiculous that something as natural and beautiful as hair can make or break the interview but they are judging you, remember.

*Make- Up – Keep it minimal at all times. Lay off of the foundation and leave the Egyptian eyes at home. A simple eye with a touch of blusher and perhaps a subtle lip will do you well. You can wear a bold lip but just be aware of everything else you’re wearing.

Less is more when you’re preparing yourself for that job interview.
Don’t let your skill and hard work go to waste because you didn’t dress the part.
Always prepare yourself and make sure you’re comfortable in what you’re wearing.

Dress to impress. Dress for success.

Posted in - -PRELIVE, -SD JOBSEEKING | Leave a comment

Positive Mental Attitude

Looking for a new job can be a full time job in itself. If you’re thoroughly disheartened in your current role you’ll be champing at the bit to get out. You’ve probably go the theme to The Great Escape as an ear worm, whistling around inside your head. Either that or you hear the stabbing violins of Psycho every time you see your current boss! You’ve cultivated a siege mentality and, whilst you think it helps you through the day-to-day, it’s actually counter-productive.

Sooner or later your Anthony Perkinsesque boss is going to have to write you a reference. You might think that you’re the only person who can hear the soundtrack in your head, but your body language is unlikely to lie.

If you’re currently unemployed, you could be forgiven for feeling sorry for yourself. Stop it. Stop it at once. Unemployment is going to create a hole in your CV that you want like a hole in your head. You are going to need to improvise by creating opportunities for yourself. [See this little gem by devilsaardvark – Fishing For Work.] Giving yourself a project will help keep you focussed and, indeed, sane.

With the best will in the world, there is every chance that you won’t get an interview for every job you apply for. Furthermore, it is only in an ideal world that you will be offered every job you interview for. Accept it as part of the process and everything else will be a bonus. The harder you work and prepare, the more effort you put in to securing a new job, the better your chances, but you mustn’t beat yourself when things don’t go your way. Grit your teeth and be determined.

You see, it’s like this. Think of how you feel after two glasses of wine. You probably don’t think you feel any different to normal. Wrong! Everyone else in the room will easily be able to tell that you’re under the influence. So if you’re in a heightened state of euphoria, anger, depression, tension or nervousness, it will stick out like a sore thumb.

Employers are extremely adept at picking up body language. They’ve attended courses on it. They can smell things like fear and desperation.

Now, focus on how you’re going to present yourself in the best possible light. And, if it helps, try telling yourself this…

I am the best [insert own name] there is. No one can be [insert own name] better than I can.

Posted in - -PRELIVE, -SD JOBSEEKING | Tagged , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Preparation Is Key

Interview success is impossible without doing your research and being prepared. You’d be surprised at the amount of people who turn up to interviews with absolutely no clue about what the company specialises in or what they’ve done in the past and more importantly, what the company has done recently.
Preparation is key when going after that next job. Key.

Search every website, journal, article, interview possible that is based on your prospective employer. You need to have an idea about what it is they believe in, what they do, who they’ve worked with…

Do you know who will be interviewing you?
It’s not good enough to memorise the name of the person. Are they a part of the team or do they hold a higher position within the company? Get searching!

Prepare some questions that you will ask the interviewer.
You might want to save these questions for the “do you have any questions?” part of the interview though – you don’t want to get too ahead of yourself!
Going back to the very first point though, your researching would have gained you some knowledge which puts you in good stead for asking a few questions of your own. Is there anything you’re particularly interested in from what you read? Are you interested in what the company has planned for the future?
With this I must insist that you listen. As obvious as it might seem, listening to what is being said is critical in interviews. From what you hear you will be able to form some on the spot questions that will showcase your listening abilities and like the prepared questions, these will show your enthusiasm for the job role and the company.

As well as preparing questions to ask, make sure there’s some good rapport throughout the interview. Obviously you won’t bring up the boozy weekend you just had but you might well comment on the weather, the amount of interviews the interviewer has had today… These types of questions are subject to the type of company you’re being interviewed by and the aura your interviewer has.

Look for common interview questions and start answering them. You need to know what you’re going to say, don’t you? Whilst you’re doing this you might also want to memorise your CV because answering interview questions needs a little back up. Remember, it is always good to refer to previous/ current positions!

What kind of interview is this and how long will it take?
Is it one to one, group or is there some form of testing? Do you know on average how long the interview will be? If you’re unsure and need to know (for travelling purposes etc) then perhaps an email or call to the correspondent in the emails/ letter is something to think about doing at least two days before the interview.

As your interview date draws closer you’ll need to get directions for the place of the interview. If you can, do a trial run so you know how long it’ll take. If a trial run isn’t possible then use Google maps to see what the building and surrounding area looks like. Make sure you leave plenty of time so that you’re not hot and flustered when you arrive at the location – remember, your interview starts from the time you set foot inside of the building.

What are you wearing?
Dress to impress! You might feel like you’re overdressed but being overdressed trumps looking ‘okay’ in the world of interviews any day.

Bring another copy of your CV and references with you regardless of whether they told you to or not.

Do you have your notepad and pen?
The great thing with these two items is that you can simply put them in your bag or your pocket (pen and paper/ small notepad in this case). You can jot down anything you think you might want to say in the interview and refer to it right up until the last moment. These two items are also important for when the interviewer gives you that vital piece of information. Going to an interview without these things is silly to say the least. It’s better to bring these essentials and not use them rather than leave them on the bed and kick yourself for not bothering at all.

Check, check and check again. Go over the original job description that prompted you to apply in the first place. Go over your cover letter and CV. Go over any material the company might have sent you. Check over everything that has gone between you and the company since applying. Checking might be tedious but you’ll be happy when the interview goes smoothly, won’t you?

And please, always remember to…
…be positive.
Smile and never speak negatively about a thing when in an interview – it isn’t professional and you might as well kiss your job goodbye if you do that.
…use relevant experience to back yourself up. There’s no point in saying you’re a team- player if you’re not going to show how.
…show your enthusiasm. This will be evident by your interview attire through to the questions you ask.

Preparation is key.

Posted in - -PRELIVE, -SD JOBSEEKING | 1 Comment

Dressing the Part

Firstly, forgive me. This is going to be about men’s clothing. My knowledge of women’s fashion is limited. Or at least that’s my story. And I’m sticking to it.

You are going to an interview. You have applied for a ‘role’ within the company and, just like an actor getting into character, you are going to have to get into costume.

Most of it is common sense, but sadly, common sense seems to be a rare commodity these days.

I don’t care what anyone else says, for a man there is no excuse for not having a suit in the wardrobe. Even a craftsman going for a job with a firm should be able to demonstrate that they have more than just their overalls. A dark grey or black suit is simply essential. No ifs, no buts, just essential. Now, if you need to rectify this shortcoming, read devilsaardvark’s ‘A Metrosexual’s Guide to Bachelorhood – episode 5a. Tailoring’ to be found in Men’s Fashion and then come back to me. Keep it sober – remember you’re going to an interview, not a stag party.

Right, now, for those of you who are umming and ahhing about whether to get the old whistle out of mothballs or not, there must be no argument; you’re wearing the suit and that’s all there is to it. No one was ever overdressed for an interview. Of it’s a little drab, you can spruce it up with a well chosen tie. Plain colour would be preferable. Daffy Duck is a no-no. OK?

OK.

If you’re one of those, “But I don’t feel comfortable wearing a suit,” types then we’re going to have to knock it out of you right away. Suggestion: put it on, with shirt, tie and suitable footwear, go into town, and buy yourself a pint. Or a crème de menthe if you’d rather, and get used to it. If you go to an interview feeling uncomfortable, you’ll look uncomfortable and guess what… Yes, you’re chances of success are instantly diminished, even if you would be wonderful in the post. Trainers, by the way, are not  suitable footwear for a suit. Track suit maybe, but if you wear a track suit to a job interview, unless you’re Mo Farrah, you deserve a life of unemployment.

Your suit should be clean and fresh. A dry cleaner will be required. The washing machine is out of the question. As with the tie, try and pick a sober, professional looking shirt. Not the one with frills at the front that makes you look like you’re in a mariachi band. There are plenty of gentlemen’s outfitters out there that even sell shirt and tie combinations to make your life easier; there is no excuse.

Shoes, as we have already discussed must, be fit for purpose. AND FOR THE LOVE OF PETE, POLISH THEM! And whilst we’re on the subject of footwear, anyone who knows me knows that the easiest way to insult my intelligence is to buy me comedy socks. If you, on the other hand are the type of creature who likes to adorn their ankles with Homer Simpson or Taz or whatever, desist on the day of your interview.

Finally, look at yourself in the mirror; preferably a full length one. Now ask yourself the following question – “Do I look professional?” If you spend the same amount of time and effort on dressing for this job interview as you do going for a big night out, then you’ll be ok.

Just employ a lot more care.

And shave. And don’t wear too much after shave. What more can I say?

Don’t tell me you want me to hold your hand as well?

Posted in - -PRELIVE, -SD JOBSEEKING | Tagged , , , , , | Leave a comment

Interview Questions – Why Do You Want To Work Here?

Bottom line here folks – if you can’t come up with a decent, credible answer to the question, “Why do you want to work for us?” you’ve proved categorically that you haven’t done the requisite research.

Many firms will have extended an open invitation to come and visit prior to your interview. This may not always be possible, but where it is, go. Should it not be possible, or where no such invitation has been extended, research. What virtues are they celebrating on their website? They are trying to sell themselves as much as you are, so find something that they’re proud of and tell them why that is important to you. It’s all about finding the common ground.

Any Tom, Dick and Harry can blurt on about how wonderful the ‘atmosphere’ is or how they felt ‘at home’ as soon as they walked through the entrance. This kind of abstract response is likely to turn an interview panel off straight away. Try and stick to what is tangible and use the question as an opportunity to reinforce your qualities and aspirations.

When conducting your research look at things like the company’s mission statement. Look at their products. Have they published any plans for future development? Do you know anyone else who works for them? What do they do for their staff that makes them stand out?

But never mention money.

Posted in - -PRELIVE, -SD JOBSEEKING | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Interview Questions – Where Do You See Yourself Three Years From Now?

Or five, or even ten.

This is where you can talk about your goals. You must have ambition, otherwise you wouldn’t be applying for the job in the first place. But if you dare say, “I want to be the MD of this company,” I’ll come and escort you off the premises myself. No one likes a smart arse.

You would like to consolidate this and improve that. You aspire to grow into the person that will be able to achieve x,y and z. You will have a clear idea of how you will be able to attain these targets through the role you are interviewing for. You have prepared haven’t you? Yes, of course you have.

It is eminently possible to demonstrate ambition without coming across as the kind of corporate, megalomaniacal, nincompoop that one sees on The Apprentice week in and week out. As long as you include your prospective employer in your plan and don’t give them the impression that you’re using them as a springboard, only to drop them like an embarrassing one night stand when the first available opportunity arises, you’ll be fine.

Posted in - -PRELIVE, -SD JOBSEEKING | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Interview Questions – If You Were an Animal…

If you don’t already have an answer to this question, then you’ve lived a very sheltered life. Whether as part of a long car journey or at the end of a night in the pub, we’ve all had this kind of discussion with friends and family.

But if you get this one in a job interview, the panel will be as interested in the ‘why’ more than the ‘what’. You might be obsessed with hamsters, but a business is probably looking for something a little more predatory. Or at least they’re looking for an explanation that converts to a strength in your character that makes you more appealing. Everyone wants to be a lion, so make sure you’ve got a sound reason why.

This kind of psychological profiling question will reveal more about you than you think possible, whether you like it or not. Cats are notoriously fickle and independent, so if you’re asked what animal you think you’re most like, and you answer ‘lion’, you might be coming across as a team player. If you’re asked what animal you ‘aspire’ to being, then the lion response could lead to the conclusion that you’re weak.

On the other hand, cats can be considered tenacious and efficient. So it all depends on how you clarify your response. Dogs can be loyal and hard working. A bee might not be a bad answer.

But do you really want to liken yourself to a rabbit?

Posted in - -PRELIVE, -SD JOBSEEKING | Tagged , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

About The Apprenticeship

If you don’t picture yourself as somebody going to university or somebody going from part time to full time work at your favourite high street chain then the best way to earn money, whilst learning in class and on site, is to do an apprenticeship.

Apprenticeships are available to those who are aged 16 and over and aren’t in full time education. With a range of careers to choose from, an apprenticeship can take anywhere from one year to four. An apprenticeship is brilliant as it prepares you for the workplace and shows your employer that not only are you skilled in your chosen career, but that you are committed to the task at hand. An apprenticeship builds a good work ethic as you learn from the best with hands on experience and training.

Whilst the minimum wage for an apprentice is £2.65, the average salary per week is £170. Dependant on your sector and who you work with though, some apprentices have been known to take home £210 per week!
With more than 10,000 employers offering apprenticeships, there are hundreds of different types available in a variety of levels.

Level 2 – Intermediate Apprenticeship
The equivalent to five good GCSE’s, the apprenticeship can see you working towards a knowledge- based qualification which equals as a BTEC or you could gain a National Vocational Qualification (NVQ) Level 2 through work- based learning. Any skills acquired at this stage will put you in good stead for the advanced apprenticeship.

Level 3 – Advanced Apprenticeship
Just like level 2, level 3 will either see you achieve a BTEC or an NVQ. In order to get onto a level 3 course, you must have five good graded GCSE’s or a level 2 qualification. Level 3 is the equivalent of having two good graded A Levels.

Level 4 and Higher – Higher Apprenticeship
The highest level of the apprenticeship tree, those doing the higher apprenticeship will be working towards either an NVQ level 4 or a foundation degree. Levels 2 and 3 or five GCSE’s and two A Levels are needed in order to enrol on a higher apprenticeship.

Functional skills such as maths, English and ICT can also be achieved within levels 2 and 3.
From horticulture to technical theatre, the opportunity the apprenticeship brings is endless and as a 16-18 year old, you won’t have to worry about any of the costs. 19-23 year olds are likely to be given up to 50 percent off of the cost whilst those who are 24 or older are more likely to pay the full fee.
Regardless of your age though, the apprenticeship is a career builder – as well as a confidence builder too! Working your way up, you will learn from the best to be the best.
A great way to get your foot on the career ladder, it doesn’t matter what your story is.
Consider your career. Consider an apprenticeship.

Posted in - -PRELIVE, -SD JOBSEEKING | Leave a comment

Interview Questions – What Are Your Strengths and Weaknesses?

What Are Your Strengths and Weaknesses? These are big hitters in the interviewer’s armoury and it’s highly unlikely that you won’t be asked these questions at some point during a job interview. Interviewers know that some people are uncomfortable answering these questions are if you’re someone who falls into that bracket, you’ll be in danger of receiving the ‘thanks, but no thanks’ letter in a few days time.

Prepare.

What are they looking for? If you have the core skills from the job and/or person spec, refer to them as strengths. Management skills and experience are always good if you’re going to be asked to manage, but we’re looking for tangible examples that back up your assertion here. Whilst they might not be asking you to sing your own praises per se, they are most definitely looking for you identify why it is exactly that you’re a strong candidate. Remember what it was that made you think to yourself, “Yes, I could do that job,” before you applied. Don’t be shy.

When it comes to weaknesses, everybody has them, so don’t even think about claiming that you’re the exception. You’ll either get ripped to pieces there and then, or you just won’t be believed, thought of as arrogant and the ‘thanks, but no thanks’ letter will be in the post. If you’ve been on courses for key skills like IT or management, then use these as examples of areas that have needed work and where you’ve taken steps to rectify shortcomings.

Good self-assessment, whether it’s positive or negative, shows an employer that you are able to evaluate your own performance and, therefore, care about your role.

If you haven’t prepared for this question by the time you sit down at interview, then you can cite shoddy preparation as one of your weaknesses.

Posted in - -PRELIVE, -SD JOBSEEKING | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment